好久没动笔了，求大神把我的作文P得像样一些

Lau督察

If people have the opportunity to get asecure job, they should take it right away rather than wait for a job thatwould be more satisfying.

Recently, some of my classmates have gotoffers from certain corporations but still hesitated to make a decision. Althoughit is plausible for us to consider whether the job will satisfy us or not, Isubscribe to the notion that we are supposed to sign with the company whichprovides us with a secure job opportunity.

It is beyond peradventure that individualshave the tendency to seek for a more satisfying job. This sort of job canimprove our living quality, especially in a mental way. If we know we are goingto take this kind of job, we will be inspired to get up early everyday, getfully prepared to go to the company, try to master impressive professionalskills and become confidence when confronting difficulties. After all, it iswith the chance that we realize our dream. Moreover, a secure position maysuppress our motivation in taking risks to making further achievement in thisarea for we think it is safe enough.

It is, however, more reasonable andpractical for us to take the secure one. First and foremost, common sense tellsus that the preliminary reason for us to get a job is to earn money to make aliving. Without adequate money, we are not able to feed ourselves, let aloneseek the satisfaction.  For instance, fora student who majors in science but is interested in art, it is more practicalfor him to be an engineer than to be an artist. Furthermore, a secure job, tosome extent, guarantees more chances of promotion. Under this circumstance, wecan acquire a higher social status which is admired by citizens and live a morereadily life. Additionally, with fortune and high-level social status, it willbe easier and more efficiently for us to chase our interest, pursuit ourdreams. Even if we alter our job at this time, we will not find it difficult tomake a living.

Nevertheless, there exists a intermediateway for us: we can wait merely for a short time when a secure job comes. If aposition comes to us, which is satisfying but not enough, we can almost acceptit immediately. In this way, it won't be so time-consuming for us to wait for acompletely satisfying position, and we can also make money. At the same time,we are able to work in a position we favor, thus doing my endeavor.

In conclusion, taking a secure position isa more appropriate way. But if we can find the intermediate way, it will bemore ideal.

山姆大叔

这种题目是比较难的类型，因为这种题目需要你对两种情况进行比较，也是比较容易跑题的题目。同时还要注意，所有的托福作文其实都不是在问你解决方案是什么，而是要你进行一个完整的reason过程。所以这种题目的标准解法是:总-分-分-比较-总 的结构。建议你在开头的时候就先选好你是觉得哪个好，然后直接倒向这一边。这样考官看起来一目了然，不会因为短时间抓不住你的思路而直接把逻辑分给你都扣掉。

这篇作文总的来说打分在22分左右，主要是因为你的说理不够清晰，导致作文说理效率太低。

If people have the opportunity to get asecure job, they should take it right away rather than wait for a job thatwould be more satisfying.

Recently, some of my classmates have gotoffers from certain corporations but still hesitated to make a decision. Althoughit is plausible for us to consider whether the job will satisfy us or not, Isubscribe to the notion that we are supposed to sign with the company whichprovides us with a secure job opportunity.

It is beyond peradventure that individualshave the tendency to seek for a more satisfying job. This sort of job canimprove our living quality, especially in a mental way. If we know we are goingto take this kind of job, we will be inspired to get up early everyday, getfully prepared to go to the company, try to master impressive professionalskills and become confidence when confronting difficulties. After all, it iswith the chance that we realize our dream. Moreover, a secure position maysuppress our motivation in taking risks to making further achievement in thisarea for we think it is safe enough.（这一段被你说得有点晕，你是想说secure job好还是satisfying job好？）

It is, however, more reasonable andpractical for us to take the secure one. First and foremost, common sense tellsus that the preliminary reason for us to get a job is to earn money to make aliving. Without adequate money, we are not able to feed ourselves, let aloneseek the satisfaction.  For instance, fora student who majors in science but is interested in art, it is more practicalfor him to be an engineer than to be an artist. Furthermore, a secure job, tosome extent, guarantees more chances of promotion. Under this circumstance, wecan acquire a higher social status which is admired by citizens and live（lives） a morereadily life. Additionally, with fortune and high-level social status, it willbe easier and more efficiently for us to chase our interest, pursuit ourdreams. Even if we alter our job at this time, we will not find it difficult tomake a living.

Nevertheless, there exists a intermediateway for us: we can wait merely for a short time when a secure job comes. If aposition comes to us, which is satisfying but not enough, we can almost acceptit immediately. In this way, it won't be so time-consuming for us to wait for acompletely satisfying position, and we can also make money. At the same time,we are able to work in a position we favor, thus doing my endeavor.

In conclusion, taking a secure position isa more appropriate way. But if we can find the intermediate way, it will bemore ideal.