8.8陈雨菲托福独立作文 TPO 10

eivissa

In today’s society,human life have changed dramatically because of the invention of the computers.The issue about children should not be allowed to play computer games which is widely discussed.As far as I’m concern,I definitely object it as a narrow and distorted view.The following reasons and examples will justify my side.


To begin with,the most vital reason is that computer games is a good way to practice our  thinking.In our daily life,the things we can access are limited.We know only a little part of the world.But through computer game we can know something which we couldn’t try in our actual life.We can use this way to Prentice our brain.As we all know,a few years ago the games named “Angry Birds” was so popular.So many people use computer to play this game. During this time,we totally think a lot and try many methods to achieve the wining of this game.I believe that it is a good way to improve our thinking skill.


Furthermore,another reason is that playing computer games can raise our interest in technology.The games are so amazing that many people want to know how to develop a computer game.It is because our curious about it,we may have a opportunity to learn more about this field.You know that,the founder of Facebook,who really like to play computer game when he was little.Just because of it,he chose to study this kind of knowledge.Finally ,he achieved success in this field.When we paying computer games we are interested in this kind of magical technology.We may want to learn more about it.Maybe one day because of this kind of interest ,child will be a software engineer.


Moreover,a few people are concerned that playing computer games is a way to waste time.And they have a risky to addicted in the game.For instance,an investigation carried out by Chinese Academy of Social last year revealed that more than eighty percent of children feel that they just use computer games to relax themselves,and they never spend to much time on it.So it prove that playing computer game is a good thing,people no need to worried too much about it.Just let children get some joy from it.

To sum up ,I convince that people don’t need to limit their children to play computer games.People can permit their children play computer games properly instead of totally ban it.I believe that children in this period totally could make good use of computer games.

山姆大叔

In today’s society,human life have changed dramatically because of the invention of the computers.The issue about children should not be allowed to play computer games which is widely discussed.（这句话的主谓宾你仔细分析一下，就会发现有很多问题。其实你应该这么写：The issue about whether children should be allowed to play computer games is widely discussed）As far as I’m concern,I definitely object it as a narrow and distorted view.The following reasons and examples will justify my side.


To begin with,the most vital reason is that computer games is a good way to practice our  thinking.In our daily life,the things we can access are limited.We know only a little part of the world.But through computer game we can know something which we couldn’t try in our actual life.We can use this way to Prentice our brain.As we all know,a few years ago the games named “Angry Birds” was so popular.So many people use computer to play this game. During this time,we totally think a lot and try many methods to achieve the wining of this game.I believe that it is a good way to improve our thinking skill.


Furthermore,another reason is that playing computer games can raise our interest in technology.The games are so amazing that many people want to know how to develop a computer game.It is because our curious about it,we may have a opportunity to learn more about this field.You know that,the founder of Facebook,who really like to play computer game when he was little（这个从句里没有谓语）.Just because of it,he chose to study this kind of knowledge.Finally ,he achieved success in this field.When we paying computer games（这个从句也没有谓语） we are interested in this kind of magical technology.We may want to learn more about it.Maybe one day because of this kind of interest ,（a）child will be a software engineer.


Moreover,a few people are concerned that playing computer games is a way to waste time.And they have a risky(risk) to （be）addicted in the game.For instance,an investigation carried out by Chinese Academy of Social last year revealed that more than eighty percent of children feel that they just use computer games to relax themselves,and they never spend to much time on it.So it prove that playing computer game is a good thing,people no（don't） need to worried（worry） too much about it.Just let children get some joy from it.

To sum up ,I convince that people don’t need to limit their children to play computer games.People can permit their children play computer games properly instead of totally ban it.I believe that children in this period totally could make good use of computer games.

字数够了，架子也到位，差不多可以打到23分左右了。注意我标红的地方，想一想都有哪些语法错误，在写作的时候要尽量避免。